Thursday, April 23

get real

Time is flying by. Finally! I think it's just because I've been so busy lately. That paper chain of mine has finally dwindled down to less than two feet of links. As of midnight tonight, we have ten days until court. I can't believe it. 

Speaking of things I can't believe, it's almost our court date. 
I know I already said that, but it is still unbelievable! It seems like we've "been in the process" for so long it has just become part of our lives. You know, we live in Texas, we attend TWUMC, we like to read and we're in the process of adopting. It's just one of those things. No longer. 

Pretty soon, we'll be packing up our bags and rubbermaids -- and a diaper bag -- for the trip of a lifetime. We'll fly for nearly a day to the other side of the world and meet a little boy who is coming home with us to be a part of our family. We'll have a son. Our parents will have a grandchild. (Boy are they excited!) Our pups will have someone new to sniff. There will be a little body to fill the highchair, stroller, and crib. Life around us will be totally different. I know this. I love this. 

It's just not quite real yet. 

I've heard the saying, "a woman is a mother when she finds out she's pregnant but a man becomes a father when he first holds his child"
 ... which begs the question ...
When will it be real for us? 

And when did it become real to you? 

18 comments:

Starshine said...

I LOVE this post. We are at the very beginning of the adoption process, so a post like this gives me lots of hope! I can't wait to see a pic of your baby in your arms.

BTW, I'm here via the Bottomly's blog.

Bethany said...

Good question...with Leul it became real the day we saw his photo. No serioulsy we felt instant connection. With our daughter I'm still trying to find that ultimate connection....I think for me it will be boarding the plane this go around. It's so easy to get caught up in our daily lives to stop long enough to allow ourselves to feel fully connected!!!!!

Hooray for almost being to your court date!!!!

neely said...

I know...can you believe we are so close. I feel so crazy! I am getting excited but trying to be prepared for both outcomes....

when will it be real...
with my bio kids- as soon as I was pregnant I felt it and as soon as Josh saw the ultrasound he felt it.
with B- as soon as we started the process I felt it (that my daughter was out there and needed me) and Josh felt it when we got our pictures.
I would say...it's real!!

Cindy said...

It became real when we walked in and met Mihiret. She started sobbing. My mommy self took over and I gathered her up knowing it would be okay. I am so thrilled that your time is almost here!!!

Starshine said...

Hi! Just got your comment on my blog. I'm gonna send you an e-mail in a minute!

The Hull's at #4 said...

Hi Nell Nell,

I know a lot of mom's might say when they heard the baby's heart beat, or when they felt movement for the first time, but for me, it was the first cry, there is nothing like that sound and the knowledge that you are responsible for everything that goes with it, the good and the bad...there's not another feeling like it in the world. God made life so rich, and we are so blessed. I love you!!!

The Bogard Family said...

Hi, Nell Ann!

Court is right around the corner. I am so happy for you and I sure hope we travel together. We have court on the 30th of April. I am praying we pass and can bring our babies home. You asked when does it become real. I felt like when I saw his picture for the first time, it was real, but now this week has been the toughest so far. I have cried a lot. I just can't hardly stand it anymore and I want to bring him home so bad because he's my baby and I don't want to miss another day without him. God is good and I know it is all in his timing.

Laurie said...

Holding both of them is when it was real for me. I mean I always felt like a mother, but THEIR mother....that was different.

I still sometimes look at their 4 and 2 year old selves and think "is this for real? I am the mother of these two?"

How did I get so lucky?

Can't wait to see that sweet brown face being kissed by yours!

Troy said...

I understand completely about the adoption process being something you 'do'.

I remember your referral day ... seems so long ago. You were the last known person on the list in front of us. And to think your boy can be 'officially' yours in just a few short days ... awesome.

Mandy said...

"The process" is almost over!!! I got chills when I was reading this post. I can't wait for that sweet baby to be home and in your arms!

Brian and Autumn said...

It'll be real when he is in your arms :)

Sunny said...

It became real to me the day Travis went with a group to a religous celebration in the city of Addis. I stayed with Petros by myself for the first time and he was CRYING. I finally got him down for a nap and let out some real tears of my own. I remember thinking, "There's no turning back now"...three months later I would have it no other way...he's a gem!

Guard Wife said...

Such a great post! Can't wait to read the "this is when I knew" follow-up post from you. :)

jody said...

when they put that baby in your hands, then it is finally real-that is how it was for me, for ALL my kiddos. and then when you are sitting up thru the night begging God to help you both as they fight to breathe/throw up repeatedly/cannot wake from a nightmare, it is more real than you could ever imagine and you will be amazed that you are allowed to be part of something so fragile and intense, it is truly miraculous.

Amber said...

Pass Court!! YAY for the day.

I think this became real to us when we saw their faces and fell in love. They really did become a part of our family that day.

of course, I cannot wait to hug them tremendously!!

Anonymous said...

Nell Annie,
The pictures in the mail today were priceless. I just held them and thought "What a beautiful nephew :)" I can't wait to hug him and tell him how lucky he is to have you as HIS mommy - and how lucky we all are to have him in our world! I am praying, but I am also rejoicing that God is making the beautiful plan that we have talked about for so many years finally become fruitful. I love you! ~Sissy

Kristi J said...

it felt real for me from the first pregnancy test and on referral day (both times :) I felt an instant connection with all my babies...I grab hold and selfishly never let anyone else touch them. For me..it is from day #1....so excited for this to almost be over for ya....I CAN'T wait to get to ET, kristi

Tarin Criddle said...

I still look at my 2- and 4-year olds and wonder whose children these are and who thought it was a good idea to leave them with ME??!?! There are just days it feels more real than others.
I would think it will happen as soon as your skin touches his. That tactile reality. That its-not-just-on-paper-anymore moment. I think when you see him and actually get to touch him, your heart will explode and that mother instinct will kick in. You won't want to put him down! (But if you ever do, that's perfectly normal too - just ask any mom!! :o)
Love you guys and am counting the days....
Tarin

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