being prepared

We're back in our least favorite part of adoption, the unknown. Many families are hanging out here actually, but it's no party. It's so strange to not know, know, then not know again. I thought by now we'd have travel dates, plane tickets, and most of our things packed. 

Life is progressing though. The first day was rough. No crying, but still rough. So many wonderful people kept calling to check and see what we'd heard. Then when the news came, many called or emailed with encouragement or to parallel grief along side us. It's not so bad now. People are still checking in on us, but I don't have any answers. That part is a little rotten. No new court date, no idea for scheduled travel, no plans for bringing baby home. While it's been unexpected, it is not so bad. I feel much more disappointed for the people I have to tell than for myself. Sometimes I catch myself feeling sad for our little guy, spending more and more days away from his family -- but I am reminded that many wonderful people are looking after him and loving him and preparing him for us. (Well, if anyone could really prepare him for us! He is in for such a shocker... I digress) My heart is happy, even if everything is still up in the air. 

I posted on facebook earlier today that I needed some enthusiastic motivation and a friend was kind enough to remind me of James 1:2-4. For those of you who also need some, here you go:

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 

Perhaps it is me who still needs to be prepared!